Letter to Poline from Aron
February 10 (and February 23rd French date), 1914
Kishinev to Paris
Rue Vieille du Temple 41
I am greeting you my dear girl, my Polinka. I just came back home. While walking home I was thinking that I might find a letter from you, and unfortunately, I didn’t. I am a little bit upset and don’t want to have a dinner, but I received a card from you yesterday, and I am very grateful for that. The whole life is being expressed on that card, my whole soul. My dear Polya, you are writing to me that you have no idea what I am feeling, but yesterday and today I had such difficult days to endure such a difficult suffering that no mind can comprehend. I don’t know how to explain it to you, but I feel like I’m getting crazy. My loneliness is going to kill me finally. I cannot live. I lost all of my energy recently. I completely lost my appetite. I don’t eat anything. I can’t sleep and all night long I’ve been thinking about you. To be honest, I don’t know if it is a strong love towards you or it is kind of mental illness. I always feel something heavy in my heart. It is so heavy that I barely can breathe. And my sufferings are as big as the suffering of a criminal who is waiting for the day of his execution. I only remember when during this short time of my sad, fast, dark life. In my memory, there is a big date which must be written in big letters the 22nd of June, 1913. The corner between Mikhailovskaya and Fontanka Street. That night, my soul was sworn to your sacred love. At that Sunday, at 8:00 in the evening I went to a place of our meeting being faithful with my whole heart expecting to see you like a hero who is going to the war to defeat the enemy to come back either defeated or a hero, and I was defeated that night. Please forgive me my friend, Polinka. I cannot write any more because I cannot see anything for the reason that I have tears in my eyes. I think I will be receiving a letter from you tomorrow, and I will write more. And now I am asking to write to me more often and again please send me a picture of you, because you promised. Please tell me about yourself and what did you hear about VJ? What have you decided regarding the dental equipment? Please describe everything in detail. My dear Polya, do not suffer. Be happy. It will make me feel better. It is 1:00 in the morning right now and I am going to bed, but I can’t sleep anyway. I am going to be thinking about you. And if I come down, then I will read the newspaper. And tomorrow I have to work for the whole day but I really hope that this period of time will pass soon. I touch your hand and I kiss you many, many times. Sweet dreams and have a good night. My love, Polya. Uncle. I will wait for your letter really really soon. Please respond to this letter very soon.
[This letter contained a supplement, which was a love poem written by Arnold (aka Aron). See “Poem to Poline from Aron February 10, 1914.”]